|
|
?????????
Till Children Do Us Part
Olympia, Wash
HALF a century ago, the conventional wisdom was that having a child was the surest way to build a happy marriage. Womens magazines of that era promised that almost any marital problem could be resolved by embarking on parenthood. Once a child arrives, we dont worry about this couple any more, an editor at Better Homes and Gardens enthused in 1944. There are three in that family now. ... Perhaps there is not much more needed in a recipe for happiness.
Over the past two decades, however, many researchers have concluded that threes a crowd when it comes to marital satisfaction. More than 25 separate studies have established that marital quality drops, often quite steeply, after the transition to parenthood. And forget the empty nest syndrome: when the children leave home, couples report an increase in marital happiness.
But does the arrival of children doom couples to a less satisfying marriage? Not necessarily. Two researchers at the University of California at Berkeley, Philip and Carolyn Cowan, report in a forthcoming briefing paper for the Council on Contemporary Families that most studies finding a large drop in marital quality after childbirth do not consider the very different routes that couples travel toward parenthood.
Some couples plan the conception and discuss how they want to conduct their relationship after the baby is born. Others disagree about whether or when to conceive, with one partner giving in for the sake of the relationship. And sometimes, both partners are ambivalent.
The Cowans found that the average drop in marital satisfaction was almost entirely accounted for by the couples who slid into being parents, disagreed over it or were ambivalent about it. Couples who planned or equally welcomed the conception were likely to maintain or even increase their marital satisfaction after the child was born. Marital quality also tends to decline when parents backslide into more traditional gender roles. Once a child arrives, lack of paid parental leave often leads the wife to quit her job and the husband to work more. This produces discontent on both sides. The wife resents her husbands lack of involvement in child care and housework. The husband resents his wifes ingratitude for the long hours he works to support the family.
When the Cowans designed programs to help couples resolve these differences, they had fewer conflicts and higher marital quality. And the children did better socially and academically because their parents were happier.
But keeping a marriage vibrant is a never-ending job. Deciding together to have a child and sharing in child-rearing do not immunize a marriage. Indeed, collaborative couples can face other problems. They often embark on such an intense style of parenting that they end up paying less attention to each other.
Parents today spend much more time with their children than they did 40 years ago. The sociologists Suzanne Bianchi, John Robinson and Melissa Milkie report that married mothers in 2000 spent 20 percent more time with their children than in 1965. Married fathers spent more than twice as much time.
A study by John Sandberg and Sandra Hofferth at the University of Michigan showed that by 1997 children in two-parent families were getting six more hours a week with Mom and four more hours with Dad than in 1981. And these increases occurred even as more mothers entered the labor force.
Couples found some of these extra hours by cutting back on time spent in activities where children were not present when they were alone as a couple, visiting with friends and kin, or involved in clubs. But in the long run, shortchanging such adult-oriented activities for the sake of the children is not good for a marriage. Indeed, the researcher Ellen Galinsky has found that most children dont want to spend as much time with their parents as parents assume; they just want their parents to be more relaxed when they are together.
Couples need time alone to renew their relationship. They also need to sustain supportive networks of friends and family. Couples who dont, investing too much in their children and not enough in their marriage, may find that when the demands of child-rearing cease to organize their lives, they cannot recover the relationship that made them want to have children together in the first place.
As the psychologist Joshua Coleman suggests, the airline warning to put on your own oxygen mask before you place one on your child also holds true for marriage. ---- From New York Times
???????
Whats the goal of our work, and study, for wealth, honor or others things? In my opinion, the sense of happiness is our final pursute and our inner necessity. We study to get good grades and enter the university. This gives us endless happiness and sense of achievement not honor or money, but we still feel happy and satisfied.
In some situations, people dont get wealth or fame from our achievement after great efforts. The writing of Hong Lou Meng is Cao Xueqins inner necessity. He wrote it from his inner heart not for wealth or fame. Under the severe pressure of the Qing Dynasty, He knew clearly that the book couldnt get him wealth or fame but probably bring him disaster. But he still finished it ......
Of course, many people got not only sense of achievement but also honor and money by doing something good for society and other people. For example, Edison got wealth and great honor from the creation of the bulb light. So did Li Shizhen, the man who studied medicine and wrote the famous book about medicine Ben Cao Gang Mu.
Then is wealth or fame useful? The answer is absolutely yes. They can let us achieve our goals much more easily. They make us satisfied and encourage other people. But dont take them too seriously and turn ourselves into the slaves of wealth and fame. Shao Yifu set us a good example. Born in 1907, Shao strived to achieve his personal dream and set up his own movie factory. He never lost himself in wealth and fame and led a simple life. He also put his heart in the public welfare career and gave more than 100 million to support the mainland public welfare career especially the education. He is clearly aware that happiness brought by wealth is temporary; the real happiness lies in making others happy. On the contrary, some people take wealth and fame as their final goal, they try to get more by all means. That is really not a fine way.
?????????
UNIT 1 ?????(15?)
Day 1? ? ?
????????????
?????????????????????????
1. So + ??? + be + ?? + that + ???????????
???So precious is time that we can not afford to waste it. ?
????????????????
?????????????????????????????????
?????????
??????????????be????????????????
???????????????????
???The Inversion????????????????????????
???????????????????????????????????
???????????????????????????????????
????
2. adj. + as + Subject????+ be, S. + V. + ??????
???Rich as our country is, our quality of life is by no means
satisfactory.
??????????????????????????
v by no means = in no way = on no account????
3. On no account can we + V. + ??????????
???On no account can we ignore the value of knowledge.
??????????????
????????
1. ??
??????????????????????????complete
inversion??
???Then began a bitter war between the two countries. ????
????????
???????????????????????????partial
inversion??
At no time can the entrance be left unguarded. ?????????
??
2. ??????
(1) Among the disadvantages that may bring to are that
+ S. + V., making + n. + adj.
?????????????? + ???????????????
?????????????????????are???????that?
????
Among the disadvantages that cars may bring to our lives are that we
could spend more time in traffic jams and we would likely spend more money
on operation and maintenance fees, making our schedules tighter and our
pockets lighter!
(2) With these steps, we can change our society into one out of which
comes the possibility that
???????????out of which comes the possibility???
?????
With these steps, we can change our society into one out of which comes
the possibility that natural resources will be fully cherished.
(3) There is a real possibility that , should there be a .
????Should there be a????if???????????????
?????If there should be a?
There is a real possibility that we can solve this problem completely,
should there be cooperation among all parties involved.
(4) never, hardly, seldom, rarely, not, until??scarcely, in no case
?????????in no way?????????by no means?????on no account
???????????at no time????????????????????
??????
By no means shall we cease to protect our environment.
(5) It was very late. Exhausted though she was, there was no hope of
her being able to fall asleep.
????????as?though???????????????????
????????????????????????????????????
1) Small as a bicycle is, it can bring a lot of convenience to our
lives.
2) Foolish though he looks, he always seems to make the wisest
proposals. ???????????????????????????
3) Try as you may, you will never succeed. ???????????
?????
?????????
A. ??
1. ??????????????????????????????
2. ??????????????????????????????
3. ????????????????????
4. ?????????????????????????
5. ???????????????????????????????
6. ???????????????????????????????
??????????????????????????
7. ????????????????????
8. ???????????????
9. ????????????????????
10. ????????????????????????????
??????
1. As for the influence of computerization, nowhere have we seen the
results more clearly than in the bank.
2. Had it not been for the timely investment from the government, our
company would not be thriving as it is.
3. Only after a year did I begin to see the results of my work.
4. The organization had broken no rules, but neither had it acted
responsibly.
5. Hardly a month goes by without word of another survey revealing
new depths of scientific illiteracy among Chinese citizens.
6. Parents planning to divorce do not sufficiently prepare their
children for the coming crisis, nor do they provide them with the necessary
assurances that they will be cared for in the aftermath.
7. Clever and resourceful though he was, he found more than a little
difficulty solving the problem.
8. Not only was she a hard worker, but she was also very polite.
9. Under a tree was sitting one of the biggest men I had ever seen.
10. Only when the researchers have obtained sufficient data can they
come to a sound conclusion.
B. ??
1. Scarcely they had settled themselves in their seats in the theatre
when the curtain went up.
2. Under no circumstances we should do anything that will benefitourselves but harm the interests of the state.
3. Not until an infant hedgehog????opens its eyes it leaves itsnest to follow its mother about.
4. Down jumped was the burglar from the tenth floor when the
policeman pointed his pistol at him.
5. Most of his classmates agree with the opinion that bad as he is, but he has his good points.
6. Not until have I passed the examination will I be able to go out to parties.
7. Not only the student disturb the authority of the older generation he can threaten the social system as a whole.
8. No fewer than one thousand people did come here to attend the competition.
9. We had hardly arrived when does she started crying to go home.
10. No sooner had he drunk the coffee when he began to feel drowsy.
??????
1. they hadhad they2. we shouldshould we 3. it leavesdoes it leave
4. ??was 5. ??but6. have II have
7. only??does8. did comecame 9. ??does
10. whenthan
????????
1. ?????
Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood. (Marie Curie)
?????????????????????????????
?????????????????????????global shortage of fresh water??????????????
Famous scientist Marie Curie once said, Nothing in life is to be feared; it is only to be understood. In the same ways, once we understand the causes of this phenomenon, we can confidently believe that we will solve the problem with the following means.
2. ?????
A man can succeed at almost anything for which he has unlimited enthusiasm.
(C. M. Schwab)
????????????????????????????????
????????????
3. ?????
The important thing in life is to have a great aim, and also the determination to attain it. (Goethe)
??????????????????????????????
???????????????????????????The important thing is to?, ???????????????????????
(1) Nothing is + (adj).er than to + V. + ?
Nothing is + more + ??? + than to + V. + ?
???Nothing is more important than to receive education. ???
??????????
(2) What a + adj. + n. + S. + V.!= How + adj. + a + n. + V.!??????What an important thing it is to keep our promise!
How important a thing it is to keep our promise!
????????????
?????????
???????????
1. The narrator may be right about?, but he neglects to mention the fact
that?
2. As opposed towidely held beliefs, I believethat?
3. Although many people believe that?, I doubtwhether the argument holds up to much analysis.
4. The advantages of B outweigh any benefit we could gain from A.
5. Although it is commonlyheldthat?, it is unlikely that?
6. There is an element of truth in this argument , but it ignores a deeper and more
basic fact that?
7. It is true that ?, but that is not to say that?
True it is unlikely
To be sureit doesnt follow
Admittedly that doesnt mean
it wont be the case
8. The main problem with this argument is that it is ignorant ofthe
basic fact that?
9. It would be natural to thinkthat?, but it would be absurd to
claim that?
10. In all the discussion and debate over?, one important fact is generally
overlooked: ?
UNIT 1 ?????(15?)Day 2 ???
? ? ?
????????????
It is universally acknowledged that + ?????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????
?????http://www.850500.com/news/103630.html
?????,??! |
|
发表于 2019-9-13 23:46:11